I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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