apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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