That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
