if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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