There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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