New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
