Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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