The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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