They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
