she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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