Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize