so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
