I'm jealous of your bromance
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
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