i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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