this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
i believe in u and ur pee
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