hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I could fuck to npr.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Randomize
