Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
