so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
