I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
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like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
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I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before