In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now