Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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