me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize