do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
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I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
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hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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