Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize