guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
