I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
