sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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