Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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