Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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