She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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