Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
