You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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