I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.