Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
