How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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