So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
