Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Randomize
