I forgot how hot balto sounded
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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