Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
