They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
