she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
That accounts for only three of the penises
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me