Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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