You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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