i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
