In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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