We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
