it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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