And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
How does one acquire holy water?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
