Im at strip club and am horny
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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