You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Panties = found
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
