You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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