omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
thus making me awesome and them whores
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
