i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
